Needed to Write

Allright, I am just gonna write shortly and whatever that's on my mind now.

So we went to Malaysia at the 22nd and returned home on the 26th. The moment I arrived home the first thing I wanted to do was make a blog of our holiday. I wanted to do it the next day thinking I would have had all the picts by then. But I didn't managed to until now...
Pictures are incomplete yet so I do not want to make a holiday blog first but then even if I had the picts, I couldn't possibly upload everything. I will go off before my computer does!
Some other day maybe when I already have all the pictures.

University starts in another 5 months. I can't wait for it to start. I need to spend 4 months to work. To earn money and most importantly gain experiences and opportunities. I basically want to work in every jobs right now. The sudden feel to need to have experiences and learn everything. Even working in the banks-which I always tell myself I never want to work in offices-crossed my mind.
Went to the bank today with my Mom and I got quite interested to be a teller. I don't know! I want to work in the tourism industry. Tours&Travel companies or hotels. I want to be a tour guide and tour leader but given the state, I can't start yet. I am sure no employers want to hire an employee for a short term period. If I work while studying, I can't leave the tourists to attend my class.
I am vexed. I don't know what to do.
Do I apply that job as an English teacher? I saw one on the newspaper and they have been posting the ad some months ago until now. The requirements are also simple. But I have no faith in myself.
Seriously I have this fear of going to work. I think I am really stupid and then I will make mistakes and bungle the job, nevermind if I suffer at my own mistakes but I can't forgive myself if others get harmed because of me. Ah, why am I so useless. Grant me some intelligence please!

Tomorrow will be my Dad's birthday! So happy about it. I have ordered a cake since 2 months ago. Kiasu right? Well because I remembered my Dad's birthday wrongly. I hope tomorrow all family members are present and then we can take a family picture with my polaroid (instax actually). Please!!!
We will also have our Graduation Ceremony at the 18th of May. Rehearsals will start on May 1.
A roughly of less than 8x of going to school still with the identity of students belonging to Sekolah Mondial. Will miss this sekolah so much! Where I have spent a decade.

Before I end,

I have my meals everyday, more than 3x sometimes. 

But the poor goes starving a day without meal.

I am thankful to be so fortunate. 

I have clothes, and I can buy them when I like.

But the paupers can't change their torn clothes.
I am thankful to be very fortunate.
I have a bed to sleep every night, with pillows, bolsters and blankets.
But the homeless always have to worry where they will sleep.
I am thankful to be really fortunate.


I am contented.
And so I am damn grateful. 
I am determined to not fulfill my wants.
And just be thankful for everything all the time.
Grato!